Mental Preparation for Negotiation

 Before entering a challenging negotiation, it’s essential to prepare yourself mentally. Self-reflection can be difficult, but it’s far better to assess your strengths and weaknesses than to have someone else point them out.

Are there aspects of yourself that you recognize but prefer to avoid? When others comment on our insecurities or issues we deny, we often say they are “pushing our buttons.”

Examples of Triggering Statements

 Here are some common statements that may trigger strong reactions:

• “When did you become a race car driver?” (criticizing driving skills)
• “Are you sure you should be eating that?” (questioning dietary choices)
• “You don’t belong here.” (challenging your place in a group)

Your response to such comments can vary depending on how well you’ve accepted your own flaws. For instance, a relaxing Saturday can be disrupted by comments like, “You never do anything around the house,” which may trigger feelings of laziness or guilt. You might find yourself thinking, “Should I be cleaning the bathroom?” or “I should have vacuumed before sitting down!”

Managing Your Reactions

 By identifying your personal triggers, you can prepare for them and manage your responses more effectively. Some negotiators may intentionally say things to unsettle their counterparts, which can lead to concessions or overlooked details in agreements. Knowing your triggers can help you navigate negotiations more smoothly and avoid unnecessary stress.

The space below is an example for you to use. Write down some of your hot buttons and ways to respond when those buttons are pushed.